I found these while checking out the rumor Tlor sent me that Danzig was going to be on the next season of Rock of Love. Luckily (or sadly) the rumor looks to be untrue. But the videos are great. And before you leave, check out Glenn showing off his book collection. Have an evil day!
"There's lots of great stories about werewolves in here. All documented. All true."
Oh, and here's the press release that started the rumor, posted on VH1's forums by a new member named "vh1producer" who has posted exactly zero times before this:
"PRESS RELEASE VH1/Viacom Corp. For Immediate Release Jan. 12, 2009 New Season of Rock of Love to Feature Metal Legend Glenn Danzig VH1 announced today that producers are now filming a new season of Rock of Love featuring metal/punk/horror-core legend, Glenn Danzig. The new show, which will premeire this July, is called "Rock of Love: Bride of Satan with Glenn Danzig." Danzig is well-known in metal and punk circles as one of the founding members of 1980s horror-core punk rockers Samhain. He went on to the form hard-rock band Danzig, which scored several top 40 hits in the late '80s including "Mother" and "She Rides." Both a singer, songwriter and multi-instrumentalist, Danzig is also well-known for his interest in the occult and all things evil. VH1 producers stated that introducing the element of Satanism would inject new life into the Rock of Love franchise as well as reach a different audience niche -- jokingly referred to by insiders as "the black market." The new series will follow the traditional Flavor of Love/Rock of Love format with a group of 20 women vying for the affection of the celebrity musician. However, at the insistence of Mr. Danzig, the winner will enter into a legally-binding marriage with Satan in a ceremony that is sure to test the limits of basic cable censorship standards. Although network executives are keeping a tight lid on the show's planned shennanigans, a few details have been leaked about planned challenges. These include: goat entrail soup and chili cook-off blindfolded nun deflowering contest sexy seance strip-a-thon virgin or family member: the sacrifice challenge name that heretic"
It kinda had me going right up to the nun deflowering contest.
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Within the space of about half an hour today, my life was lifted into the bright light of joy, then pulled back into the cynical mire. I can't believe this isn't true. I am depressed.
ReplyDeleteI mean...the winner was going to have to marry Satan for god's sake. No justice.
Are you "vh1producer", Jack Burden? I wouldn't fucking doubt it.
ReplyDeleteAlso, do you think Danzig would let me borrow Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire from his bookshelves?
I'm too busy being Dancezig to be vh1producer.
ReplyDeleteNo, he would not let you borrow his Harry Potter books. But he would let you borrow an old fashioned JEET KUN DO ASS WHOOPIN!