ULTIMATE LUNCH BATTLE: B.L.T. vs. TUNA SANDWICH!!

In the red corner, weighing in at approximately 4 ounces, purchased for $1.90: A BLT!
In the blue corner, weighing in at upwards of 6 ounces, purchased for $1.60: A tuna sandwich!
Let's get a better look at our contenders...

BLT is... kind of lame, actually. Four half pieces of bacon and an overly generous bed of lettuce. The "B" comes first for a reason, food preparation jerks. If I ever need a LBT, I'll let you know.
Tuna sandwich appears nicely packed with fishpaste and mayo. Looks a little unpleasant squishing out the front like that, but I don't typically buy tuna sandwiches for their physical beauty.

ROUND ONE: Flavor!

BLT unsurprisingly tastes like a wet wad of lettuce with a hint of mayo and a teasing touch of bacon flavor. Seriously, it's like a tiny man made of bacon let out a fart a few chairs down while I was snacking on a side salad. And now I can't stop thinking about a tiny bacon man farting baconey farts. What a pleasant thought.

Tuna sandwich is quite good. Nice tuna flavor, but not overly tuna-ish. They didn't fuck up the whole thing by adding hideous fat chunks of celery like most uncultured slobs. It's got lots of mayo and has the consistency of pudding. I have to say this is the best tuna sandwich I've ever had from a cafeteria. In fact, the only one. Bravo, cafeteria lady. Nice sandwich.

Well, I guess that's a TKO. No need for more rounds. I happily ate the rest of the first tuna sandwich half and wondered if I should bother eating the rest of the BLT. I mean, it's so bland. I hate wasting food, but what can I do? I have a super tasty tuna sandwich half and a crappy LBT that I don't feel like finishing. What would you do?

You'd cram the tuna sandwich INSIDE the LBT, that's what!! If anything can make a bland dish better, it's shoving a tuna sandwich inside it. If only that worked on people. I really wish that worked on people.

Wow! Now that is a damn good sandwich surprise. It's like if you went to the dentist to get your teeth cleaned, but when you got there the place was full of hookers. Exactly like that. Except I didn't have to pay hookers. Or get my teeth cleaned.
The tuna sandwich nicely toned down the saladness and brought out the bacon flavor. I wasn't sure bacon and tuna would taste good together, but then again, has bacon ever made anything taste worse? Never. I defy you to think of anything in the history of the universe that has ever been made worse by adding bacon to it.

It was at this point that I realized I've finally managed to completely alienate myself from my coworkers. They've all probably been glued to the windows watching me take pictures of my lunch after every bite. "Check it out, that weird guy is photographing his food again. Did he just put a sandwich inside of another sandwich? Someone needs to fire that psycho before he brings a shotgun to work. Or offers to share his food with us."

Final thoughts:
The BLT was 20% good. Mostly due to it containing some amount of bacon in it.
The tuna sandwich was 90% good. It would have been better with some cheese and maybe a touch of mustard, but extra points for not being filled with celery, my arch-nemesis.
The TLB (tuna, lettuce, bacon. As you can see, I tossed the tomato slice) was 98% good. Cheese would have given this sandwich a perfect score. If Zeus came down from Mount Olympus and made me a tuna sandwich, I bet it would taste just like this. But with cheese. Tasty Zeus cheese.